We Are All Spoiled Smash Babies

The Super Smash Bros. roster has gotten so unbelievably large and inclusive that we all expect the best, and won’t accept a first-party Nintendo add.

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The final fighter for Super Smash Bros. Ultimate’s first round of DLC was revealed today and it turned out to be… Byleth from Fire Emblem: Three Houses. Which is somewhat of a letdown. Let’s face it, after all the other amazing characters that have been added to Ultimate’s roster, getting yet another Fire Emblem cast member is pretty disappointing.

Which brings us to the biggest problem with Smash right now. Our lord and savior Sakurai has given us all such incredible gifts and amazing DLC characters that our expectations are off the freaking charts. We’re expecting each fighter reveal to be some incredible, mind-blowing, out of left field pick that fills us with so much joy that we temporarily remember what childlike happiness feels like. Simply put, thanks to the lofty heights of our imaginations, we have all become spoiled Smash babies.

Byleth? More Like Blah-Leth

Sakurai accomplished some impossible goals all for the sake of Smash’s DLC. A Persona character from a game that’s never even appeared on a Nintendo console? An N64 platforming legend previously thought to be unobtainable due to Microsoft’s ownership? Terry from friggin’ King Of Fighters?! This reads less like a description of DLC fighters and more like a fantasy list that you’d find on someone’s Tumblr. Yet, somehow these are all real Smash DLC characters that can bought and played with right now.

As a result of this bounty, Smash fans do nothing but salivate over potential new DLC roster members that were previously thought to be unimaginable or ridiculous to even suggest. What about Master Chief? Dante? Doomguy? Charley Chuck from Food Fight? It’s all possible! Everything is possible! The floodgates that held back our hopes and dreams have been cracked wide open and now Smash hype is at an all-time high.

So when the next fighter is revealed to be the eighth (!) Fire Emblem character to be added to Smash, there’s no way to not feel cheated.

Oh The Folly Of Sakurai

The truth is, Smash has shot itself in the foot with DLC. Before the game was just a fun excuse for Mario to punch Falco in the face. Now, it’s more than that. Sakurai has brought in so many outside companies and non-Nintendo owned franchises that Smash has become a monument to video games. It’s practically a living museum that showcases the biggest names in gaming history.

Going through the roster, there are currently characters licensed and owned by Capcom, Bandai Namco, Sega, SNK, Square-Enix, Konami, and Microsoft. You can see Solid Snake square up against Cloud Strife. Princess Daisy can go one on one with Bayonetta. There could even be a full-on battle royale between Mario, Pac-Man, Sonic, and Link to determine the king of the video game mascots. It’s an insane package that transcends the goofy little brawler Super Smash Bros. started out as.

So now whenever Nintendo adds in one of its own characters we feel nothing. Remember when Pirahna Plant was announced as the first DLC fighter? Who wanted to play as a random Mario enemy when Ryu from Street Fighter was right over there? We need something crazy and unpredictable to be added to the game. We need characters who are so beloved that they exceed regular video game fandom and have their own cultish following. Someone that Nintendo just pulls out of its back pocket just isn’t going to cut it anymore.

Unless of course, it’s Waluigi or Geno. That’s an entirely different story.

More. We Must Have More…..

Sakurai has opened the Pandora’s Box of Smash fandom and once opened it can never be closed. If the next character is simply Mario in a Tanooki Suit or a random enemy from a Kirby game, fans will cry out in blind, entitled rage. Where’s Geralt Of Rivia? Where’s Nathan Drake? Where’s Charley Chuck from Food Fight damn it?!

We’ll never be satisfied. If Crash Bandicoot is added in, we’ll demand Spyro The Dragon. If Scorpion gets in, we’ll angrily tweet for Noob Saibot. Smash isn’t just Smash anymore, it’s the point of existence for all of gaming, and if our favorite isn’t in then Sakurai may as well just spit in our faces.

Is this a fair way of thinking? No. Is this a rational line of thought? Of course not. But it is Smash now. We will always be hungry for more fighters and we won’t rest until every character gets in. Because after all, if Glover can’t throw a pokeball at Pitfall Harry then what’s the point of even playing this game? This is the world we live in and there’s no one to blame but Sakurai.

#CharleyChuckForSmash

Link Source : https://www.thegamer.com/super-smash-bros-spolied-fans/